Challenged To The Core - Kathi Brixey

I was listening to talk radio recently; more specifically it was Dr. Laura’s show. She made reference to the “V8 Juice” commercial where someone is hit on the forehead for not thinking. This started my thought process for today’s article. I’m sitting here at my desk looking at a picture of three of the most gorgeous, intelligent, and perfect children that were ever born. I’m sure that you know by now that I am referring to a picture of our children (No surprise of my opinion, right?). In this picture they are holding onto each other at our son’s graduation from his university. It was a wonderful day filled with promise. However, if you knew them as well as I do, you would see in the girl’s faces that they were being tickled and wanted me to hurry and take the picture so that they could escape their brother’s grip. Isn’t that just like children, always in such a hurry to move on to the next event in life? I wonder if we all do that. We date, hurry into marriage and eventually have children with no thought of how to or even if we can be effective parents. More importantly, we don’t have a clue about what it takes to be godly parents. I know I didn’t, but fortunately for our children, I learned quickly. We are not perfect parents, we made and still do make mistakes, but we have learned how to turn to God and the Bible for help. It’s almost like “parenting by the numbers”.

You have to attend classes to get a drivers license and pass a test, almost all things in life that carry responsibility require some sort of schooling. Why then do we not insist on parenting classes to learn how to raise responsible productive adults, who will contribute back to society? My spirit is crushed every time I am faced with the reality that there are adults out there who are parenting their children with absolutely no forethought or planning. It takes more than biology to be a parent. It takes more than physical maintenance to truly care for a child. What it does take is mountains of patience, endurance, mind boggling creativity, and a heart that never gives up, never stops loving, and never quits wanting the very best for your child. I’ve quoted Elizabeth Stone before because this is such a true statement. “Making the decision to have a child is momentous; it is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.”

There were never more true words than these. While your children are small you can influence them; impacting, impressing, and molding their hearts and minds to prepare them to be wise adults. That’s right you’re not raising children your raising adults. We don’t need any more grown children running around, we have enough of those already! Even after they leave home to begin their own life your heart does not stop caring, loving, and even from time to time worrying. So where do we go from here?

Over the next month or so I want to share with you the concept of “parenting by the numbers”. We will look at eleven steps that I believe will help you to raise wise, God loving and serving adults. My husband and I have used these steps and have shared them with countless others. They are excerpts taken from my book on parenting. My challenge to you is this, before you can raise wonderful adults you must first learn what God expects of and from you as a parent.

The first step is of course realizing God’s plan for us as individuals and as parents. In Proverbs 19:21 it says “Many plans are in a man’s heart, but the counsel of the Lord will stand.” God admonishes us to be prepared. The best place to prepare yourself for parenthood is in the Word. Information on daily care for your child such as “diapering, bathing, and feeding” can come from family members and friends. But, God has a plan that He wants you to write “on the tablet of your heart.” (Proverbs 3:3). God has all the answers for us as individuals and as parents. As parents we should be in the Word daily for strength, reassurance, and wisdom. What better place to be than with your Heavenly Father. Proverbs 1:5 instructs us to be wise, then in Jeremiah 1: 5-10 God tells us to know who He is and to model Him for others. If we don’t know who He is for ourselves then how can we teach our children about their heavenly Father? In understanding who God is and learning His nature we can be more patient, understanding, and show our children more grace when they stumble.

As you go about your week and as you begin to “check your pulse” in regards to who God is in your life, my prayer for you is that with a full understanding of who God is to you, your children will come to know Him as well. Regardless of how old your children are your parenting skills will quickly grow when you commit yourself to Him and to being you child’s parent.