Challenged To The Core - Del Brixey

Computer viruses are annoying, frustrating and can do a lot of damage in our personal and business life, not to mention the time we waste in trying to recover from the loss of our information. I am almost fanatical about running several different “anti-virus” programs on a weekly basis. As I was walking the dog this week, which by the way is my best time to think, it occurred to me that if every couple would take the time to run “anti-virus soft-wear” every morning that we could limit the number of marriages that “crash and burn.” If we would “wear them” or “bind them” around our life as we get dressed, what a difference it would make. Take a few minutes as you read to scan your life over each point for any “virus” that may be hidden near your heart.

Virtual reality…

Millions of people escape “actual reality” by spending a large portion of their day in “virtual reality” mediums. It could be as innocent as being hooked on watching football or a television series where you can’t wait for the next episode or it could actually be destructive. A dangerous form of escapism for men is in the viewing of pornography; regardless of what you may have been told, men don’t buy “soft” or “hard” porn magazines for the content of the articles. This visual addiction may provide a momentary “escape” from their problems, but it actually increases the severity of their pain when they can’t relate to real-life women and become plagued with guilt and remorse. Women are not immune to the lure of pornography either; however, it comes in a different form. Whereas men are stimulated visually, women are stimulated emotionally. That’s why romance novels are filled with illicit sex, excuse me “romance”, because women crave an emotional connection that is sometimes missing in their life. These books or “soap operas” become just as addictive and harmful because they cause women to measure the worth of real-life men against a “fictional” character fabricated in some writer’s mind that no one is able to compete with in the sometimes mundane routine of everyday life. When we get up in the morning or even throughout our day, we should scan our life for any areas of “virtual reality” that we may be obsessed with, so we can filter what we allow into our mind.

Inappropriate relationships...

It should go without saying, but we all need an occasional reminder to guard against forming inappropriate relationships. Just as a counselor must take care in the way they “meet” with clients of the opposite sex; open doors, glass windows or even a refusal to meet without a third party present for the sessions. We must guard our marriages by carefully planning our interactions with members of the opposite sex. I know of some men who have even quit jobs because their companies forced them to travel with a woman partner. It had nothing to do with the moral integrity of the woman; they just knew their weakness in this area and were willing to draw a line in the sand to protect their marriage. Carpooling for work, attending our children’s sporting events alone or even activities at the local church can “lead us into temptation” if we are not prudent in scanning our heart for potential viruses.

Rusty wires...

Electronic equipment, cars or even the lights in our homes can be rendered useless if rust is allowed to build up on the wires. Husbands and wives must work to stay connected in our fast paced culture. With responsibilities pulling spouses in a variety of directions we can lose touch with the most important relationships in our life; God and our spouse. We must spend both quantity and quality time with each. What good does it do to make a commitment to either God or our spouse and then ignore them by spending every waking moment doing something for everyone else? Quiet times with God and our spouse are the “oil” needed to prevent the “rusty wire virus” from developing over time.

Unresolved conflicts…

Have you ever gone to sleep mad? Some of us are better at it than others, but it still can take a toll in our life. We either don’t get the sleep we need and/or our relationship suffers because the wall between us and the other person gets a little bit taller the longer we don’t resolve the conflict. Is it hard? Yes. Is it worth it to solve the problems? Yes. Then why do we hesitate to apologize? There are no easy answers to this question, but there is a solution; resolution. As painful as it might be, it’s far better than the alternative; a broken home, a fractured marriage or a splintered friendship. When our “virus” scan reveals these situations, be sure to click on the icon that says “resolve.”

Simple ignorance…

Now that’s a paradox; simple ignorance. There is nothing simple about being “ignorant.” We have more resources at our finger tips than any other generation has ever had. We can “google” any topic, at any time from almost anywhere in the world. I guess the “simple” part is wrapped up in how “simple” or easy it is to not notice what is going on around us because we are too busy. My wife will often inform me about something she sees that I am not aware of in my life. It can be very frustrating to feel her pearls of wisdom around my neck, but if I am not willing to hear it from her would I be willing to hear it from anyone? We need to allow “virus” scans to run automatically when danger breaks through the firewall of our life. Our spouses, friends and mentors should be allowed to sound whatever alarm is needed to get our attention. Don’t hit the “ignore” button, be ready to listen.

Anti-virus “soft-wear” is not cheap; the best products always cost more than cheap imitations. Love and faithfulness are expensive. If we want to “wear” the best, we must invest; time, energy, and emotion. As you “check your pulse” this week, take the time to check the “code” that’s written on the “tablet of your heart.” If you find some “error” messages allow God to rewrite the “script”, that way “love and faithfulness” will never be erased or permanently deleted from your hard drive.

Del Brixey
“Scanned Daily”

CHALLENGED TO THE CORE
P.O. BOX 414
LAKE ARROWHEAD, CA 92352-0414

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